I've never been good with titles

You know what's really annoying? Yesterday I had a million and one ideas for blog posts buzzing in my mind but no bloody internet connection (Can you seriously imagine me going 24 hours without internet? Neither can I, not sure how I made it alive) but now that my internet connection is back it's like my mind has been erased. As though my brain is a computer and the person on it decided to wipe the history, removing every little detail I deemed necessary just because some inappropriate thoughts might have been floating up there.

Side Note: I hate that about 

erasing history browser on chrome. 

Like you can't just delete your 

cookies or cache from one 

website it always has to be 

'the past hour' or 'the beginning of time'

(Also keeping with the side note theme ayy)

You could argue that I could have written all these ideas down but I'm the type of person that when the moment is gone it's GONE and even if I have the idea written down to the little witty jokes I'd make in my posts I would still not be bothered to post it because the time I felt like I wanted to post that thing is gone and now I'm rambling and nothing makes sense whatsoever ugh.

One thing that is for certain is that I'm feeling depressed and empty and lonely and all those shitty feelings again woop de doo. I remember thinking yesterday (when I had no internet connection) what idea would be more depressing- 1) Getting my internet back and having no messages whatsoever? 2) Getting my internet back and seeing all the messages I do have are from group chats and no one seems to care that I've been offline for the whole day despite being much more active usually. 

I think that says something about me, if all I wonder is how little people think about me, rather than how much. How do I stop feeling lonely? I don't like it. And I've gone to a ton of my friends about this problem already and the more people I tell the more attention seeking I become but that's exactly what I am ATTENTION SEEKING BECAUSE ATTENTION MEANS IM NOT LONELY AHHH

no but for real the first thing i do when i come on blogger is look at my audience and see how many views i've gotten in the past week lmao pls luv me

I have no idea where this is going so I'm going to end it here, I find it weird how my writing style changed so drastically from quite formal to nah bruh. 

Until next time-

Minoo x